What is it like?


Copyright Ron Almog

I have been asked many times over the years what it like to have an uncanny ability to understand human behavior, spot deception and see the truth.

When I first found out I had this ability and I was asked this question, I truly had no clue how to answer.

What was it like to be me?

I remember thinking what is like to be YOU? 

How do you answer that?

There is no easy answer because you can’t be me and I can’t be you.

But having lived with the knowledge I have an unusual ability for years now, I have been able to immerse myself into the mindset of the normal person’s thinking and I now believe I have an idea how to answer the question what it is like to be me.

Imagine living in a brilliantly colorful world–where red glows like a neon stop sign or a candy apple tulip, where blue varies in shade from light sky blue to deep midnight blue in hue.  Where daffodils spray fields in yellow and tulips in pink, and glow like an evening sunset.

You get that picture.

Now imagine you meet someone who can only see black and white.

How would you tell them what you see?

How do you define red, pink, blue and all the hues?

Imagine everyone around you only sees black and white with maybe a hint of some color in every fiftieth person you meet.

How would you explain your world to them?

How would you explain how red makes you feel?  And that you know instinctively it means “caution” and can also mean romantic love–that our hearts are red–that flesh is red–that it conveys so many messages?

How do you communicate that–that which others can’t see?

Seeing red can be brilliant, and yet it can be alarming and concerning.

When you see color–you know each color definitely conjures up a response for you–it’s stimulus, but for people who only see shades of gray, they don’t react.  They see your reactions as foreign, unfamiliar and odd.

How would YOU feel?

Yet you know you are seeing something.  How can they not see it? It’s so obvious before your eyes, right?

You come to realize that you perceive a very different world, and react to stimuli much differently than most people.

You understand others, but no one understands you.

You must work to fit into their world.

I feel like I am person who can see full color living in a color-blind world.

For years, I never met a person who understood me or got me.

But that has all changed today.  Since I have discovered my differences, I have learned to articulate the different hues and shades I see. I am able to explain it in words so others can get a hint of what I experience.  I can share the “colors” I see with others and it has illuminated my world beyond color. It has added so much more light and depth.

And in this process of self-discovery, I have also been blessed with the opportunity to meet several other people who truly see what I see and can share in a similar experience of life.  For that I am so very grateful.

An Expert in Deception
www.eyesforlies.com

The Life of a Human Lie Detector

rapeseed and the tree

I was out at a social gathering recently, and someone asked what I do for a living.

Not wanting to throw it out there, I said, “I’m a trainer.”

My talking companion continues, “Oh really?  Who do you train?”

Trying to slow or stop the inquiry of information, I continue to reply with short answers, “Law Enforcement”.

Inevitably, though, the next question comes, “What do you train?”

Not one bit interested to lie, though wishing the inquiry had stopped earlier for their sake, I say, “Human behavior and deception.”

And the funniest things happen when people have secrets.  They bolt the first instant they can.

And the manner in which they bolt is usually so bold, it causes me to watch in disbelief every time.

Every time.

My internal dialogue is always the same, “I can’t believe this” — though, of course, I can.  It just never gets old or boring.

People who do this couldn’t wear a bigger beacon on their back that says “I’m HOT” and not the hot sexy type, folks.  Hot on fire with a story or two!

I then chuckle and wait to find the golden goose and it always comes out from someone.

And this day was no different.  That person didn’t tell me a lie, but they told others a whopper and when I heard others repeat it, I knew it instantly.  Just sadly others fell for it.

I just listen, smile and keep my mouth closed.  It’s not my place to expose one’s secrets, which causes another funny side effect.  Because I don’t call people out on their lies, they think I don’t have any talent.  Sorry to tell them who that joke is on…

LAPD HQ

Got a tour yesterday…was an amazing building!  Be back soon!

Jodi Arias: Does she have no emotions?

If you’ve been following the Jodi Arias trial on TV, you’ve undoubtedly caught some news shows talking about Jodi Arias and her behavior. Many people, including experts, will tell you that Jodi Arias doesn’t feel emotions–that all she does is act and mimic others because she doesn’t feel anything–as that is classic for psychopaths. It […]

Mirror Neurons At Work

Juliette en larmes

I’ve gotten a good lesson on the power of mirror neurons lately.  It’s been fascinating.

In my class that I teach to law enforcement, I play multiple videos that show intense emotions.  Usually while the videos play, I take a seat facing the audience off to the side of the class. I typically can’t see the video because I want to be out the way and not infringing on the screen so my audience gets the be possible view.

When I videos play, I often find something to distract myself, but inevitably, there are a few minutes where I am waiting for the video to end and it is at ths time that I am facing the students.

Multiple times now I have felt a flush of emotion come over me when look at students, and I’ve realized when this happened that I am looking at a person who is intensely feeling the emotions of the person in the video they are watching. 

I just never knew how powerful mirror neurons could be that they could affect a person watching a video and also affect me, who is not watching the video, but watching the person who is watching the video.

I have seen these videos hundreds of times so they don’t affect me anymore. I have become desensitized to them over time, but clearly I am not desensitized to others who are reacting to them.

Isn’t that bizarre? 

I have felt my eyebrows go oblique only to realize I am starring at a young mom who feels great pain seeing a parent plea for their missing child.

It’s been absolutely astounding to experience.

I always enjoy pointing it out to my students that when you just watched that video of a desparate mom, you four displayed strong signals of sadness.  They typically have no idea their eyebrows knitted together in an “A shape” but they do acknowledge they did feel pain or heartbreak for the people in the video.

It’s incredibly fascinating.

I wonder if psychopaths have a short-circuit when it comes to mirror neurons? I suspect they do!