Alec Baldwin’s Interview on ABC

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Did you catch the interview of Alec Baldwin last night with George Stephanopoulos? He talked about the horrible day in October of this year, when a prop gun went off on the set of Rust, and killed cinematographer Halyna Hutchins and wounded director Joel Souza.

I found the interview very hard to watch. He turned my stomach inside out multiple times.

Baldwin showed an arrogance, a defiance and a callousness that bothered me.

Did you catch those? They are always red flags for you to pay attention, because exactly as seen, it can affect your safety. People who have those traits will always put themselves and their needs above you.

Baldwin actually showed more sadness for himself then he did for Halyna or the trauma he caused his crew. At times, it was simply, and disgustingly, all about him, even though he said that he did not want us to see him as a victim.

It’s very clear, however, Baldwin sees himself as a victim. He also sees himself as special and deserving of special treatment.

Do you see the signs of a toxic personality here??

I do.

According to Baldwin, nothing was his responsibility, and frankly, I don’t buy it. Not for a second.

His interview was done in desperation because he fears being held accountable and how that will cause him to suffer. It wasn’t about how his actions or in-actions caused grave harm and death. No, He doesn’t want to be held liable in anyway for what happened. The entire interview was him trying to find anything or anyone else to hang this horrible accident on.

I can’t imagine any lawyer telling him to do this interview. His arrogance actually hung him out to dry and will help those suing him. Not surprising for his personality type. They think they can convince you of their “truths”.

Do I believe Baldwin set out to intentionally harm people on the set? No.

Are there indications that someone else tried to cause havoc and harm on the set knowingly? I haven’t seen anything to support this yet, but that could always change. I’m not privy to the investigation.

Do I think there was a dangerous and reckless disregard for the safety of others? I absolutely do.

Do I think Baldwin was acting recklessly by not following safety protocols on the set? 1000%. And he should be held liable. He may not be the only person here who acted with recklessness and lack of concern for the safety of others, but he was at the helm of this production–the one ultimately responsible. And he doesn’t want to own that on any level.

Do I think Baldwin has skipped those safety steps before? I do. He clearly thinks he doesn’t have to do that stuff because he pays people, which is rubbish. Safety is safety and no one regardless of status is above that.

The fact that Baldwin said toward the end of the interview that he didn’t feel any guilt about what happened–I hope that cause a strong reaction in you, because it should. It shows his utter disregard for others and his completely lack of empathy. Any human being who has empathy would feel guilty as hell for what happened in that scenario and the fact he didn’t, speaks volumes.

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Keep your eyes out in 2022!! I am going to be offering a very limited special 1:1 training/coaching for people who want to learn how to identify people who cause harm! I will only be accepting people who are very serious about learning this skill set and truly want to change their lives.

How empathetic are you?

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jclk8888 / Pixabay

Empathy

We all want to believe we have it. We want to believe we are compassionate, kind and considerate. But are you, truly?  Few people question themselves about it.

Have you ever said to yourself….wait! Am I lacking an empathetic response here? Am I being inconsiderate?  Am I being unkind?  Did I truly put myself into that person’s shoes before judging them?

It’s a very natural response for us to reflexively respond in judgement and defense then it is for us to be empathetic. Think about it.

If you say yes, that you have reflected on this exact topic, then that’s a great indicator that you have a good degree of empathy.  And let me stop you, it shouldn’t come when someone is questioning you–saying perhaps you haven’t been empathetic. I’m talking have you ever just stopped yourself in a situation and wondered if you were truly being empathetic, without prompting?

If you haven’t, maybe it’s time for a an engine check and a tune-up?

This is a great empathy test by the Greater Good Magazine–Science-based Insights for a Meaningful Life from Berkeley.

Empathy involves putting yourself into the shoes of another in an attempt to feel what they may be feeling, to understand their situation from their point of view, not yours.

We all walk around with different levels and abilities to empathize with people. There are also different forms of empathy. There is emotional, cognitive and compassionate empathy. You can read an interesting article about it here.

Empathy is something that children need to be taught as early teenage development brings about strikingly self-centered behavior. It’s a natural part of our emotional development. Children and young adults are notorious for being self-centered. It’s their “toy”, their “game”, and if someone did something wrong, it wasn’t them even when the frosting is all over their cheeks and the cupcake is gone. She ate it, not me, right?

Being empathetic is essential for happiness in life. Without it people suffer.  A lack of empathy can cause devastating effects not only to the people around a person lacking empathy, but also for the person who lacks empathy themselves. They will struggle to form emotional bonds, build deep and lasting relationships and may never experience true love.

Empathy is not only good for others, but good for you, too!

Take the Empathy Test.   How empathetic are you?

Feel free to share your results below in the comment section.  I found my results fascinating.

Are you really empathetic? Or are you sympathetic?

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Many people believe they are empathetic, but the reality is they are not. Can you differentiate between empathy and sympathy?

Sympathy is feeling sorry for a person’s situation.  You see they are sad and you acknowledge it, but you really don’t connect to that feeling in yourself.

As an example, your friend gets a diagnosis. You’ve never had a serious diagnosis, so you will feel bad for them, and you wish them well, but you really don’t get what it feels like to be in your friend’s situation–so you can’t connect to those feelings.  You just know its a bummer, negative, sad and not good.

And then again, maybe you can.  Seeing your friend’s emotions stirs up a time in your past: You remember when you were sick and in the hospital once and felt helpless and hopeless, and lost and alone. The latter of these two examples is empathy.

Empathy is the ability to truly find that place in yourself that connects to how that person is feeling and to feel it yourself.  So when I see a friend truly sad and hurting, I connect to that part of myself and I can understand their pain. I can intuitively feel it. I know it. I connect to it, and hence connect to you.

The video above is a really good description–I highly recommend watching it (if you haven’t–I’m talking to you!).

Some people have highly active mirror neurons that fire when they see an emotion on another person’s face. Just by seeing it, their brain lights up the same emotional part in their brain and they begin to feel that emotion. Often times this occurs without awareness!

I’ve witnessed this many times in when I teach my classes. These people are highly empathetic people–extremely tuned in to other people’s emotions.  Not everyone has a natural mirror response.

In my training, I play videos with high emotional content.  When I am playing my videos, I often am reading email or thinking about something else.  I’ve seen them 100s of times.  And every now and then, when I am paused and thinking — looking around as I think, I feel a wave of emotion come over me, or I’ll feel my face literally go sad. And I’ll stop myself.   I’ve questioned, why do I suddenly feel sad?

What is going on is my mirror neuron’s have kicked in and I didn’t even realize it!!  As I become aware of what is going on,  I will inevitability find myself staring a person who is highly engaged in the video making a very strong emotional expression. And without even realizing it, my dang mirror neuron’s trip off in my head, induced the emotional response in me and I’m making the freak’n expression on my face.  I’m also feeling the emotion too!  It’s usually sadness that I key into.  Isn’t that wild?

I’m reacting to a person–who is reacting to a video I am not watching! I’m pretty numb to the videos too because I’ve played them so many times. It’s very powerful and profound.

So are you empathetic?  Or sympathetic?  Or both?

And do your mirror neurons fire and activate when you see other people’s emotions on their face?

If you aren’t  sure, next time you see someone displaying a very strong emotion on their face, pause yourself.  Is your face making the same expression?  If so, you’ve caught your mirror neurons at work!  You’re highly sensitive to other people’s emotions and probably extremely empathetic.

If you don’t respond, don’t beat yourself up. You are a not as emotional as some people, and that’s good too. We need people who aren’t as emotional in life to help society do the jobs those with emotions can’t do! And we thank you for that, too!  You are equally important!

If the world depended on me to do the work of a doctor, firefighter or policeman, we’d be in serious trouble!

Study: Acetaminophen (Tylenol) Makes You Less Empathetic

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This is a chilling study:  If you or anyone you interact with takes acetaminophen, take notice!  It may affect their behavior towards you.  Yes, you read that right. That’s what new research has discovered.

According to research out of Ohio State University, people who take acetaminophen have an immediate change in their ability to empathize or feel pain. It affects both their perceptions of their own pain and ability to empathize, but also how they perceive other’s pain emotionally and physically (once the drug takes affect).

According to the study, acetaminophen also blunts feeling of positive emotions such as joy!

I wonder how acetaminophen affects our facial expressions then. Could it possibly interfere with our ability to make them, and our ability to read them like Botox does?

It’s scary researchers are just discovering this.

It makes you think twice about taking it, doesn’t it?

I am sure the people who take it, myself included, have no indication there are changes going on. I never sensed a change. Have you?

It hints at just how biological we are.  Change one element by introducing a new chemical, and our mood, behavior, or personality can be effected.  Even how we perceive others can change and we can absolutely be in the dark that it is occurring.

So the next time you see someone pop these little white pills, think about your interactions with that person.  Do you really want to ask for a favor at that time?  Maybe immediately after they pop the pills, but don’t wait an hour!  You may regret it.

Do you have “cognitive” or “affective” empathy?

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brain lobes

A team of researchers, led by Robert Eres, from Monash University in Australia, have identified that people have physically different brains depending on the type of empathy they have.

I do not find this surprising at all. I believe that who we are is much more hard-wired than most of us realize.

So the question is: Are you a rational or emotional decision maker?

If you are emotional, you have affective empathy. If you are rational, you are a cognitive empathy.

When I sum up a person in front of me when assessing people, this is one element I look for immediately.  People wear how they make decision on their face.

Why is this important for me?  Because if you are telling me something, I will know how reliable you are by the type of decisions you make (rational or emotional).  Emotions cloud judgement and will affect one’s ability to see things clearly and that matters when getting to the truth!