Rifqa Bary Sent Back to Ohio

Relig-TeenConvert
October 13, 2009

Rifqa Bary has been returned to Ohio Tuesday at the request of her parents, and is now in the custody of Franklin County Children Services. She will stay with a foster family under the care of the state for the time being, and she will have her phone and internet supervised. You can read more here and here.

Thanks M.S. for the update.

Emotions be Damned

Dentist reviewing patient's records in exam room

That pesky integral part of us that can scare us to safety, our emotions, can also scare us into silence and inaction. Like all humans, I am no exception to this rule and even though I am well aware of it, I, too still fall victim to it now and then myself. This is one such story.

Read more I went to a dentist a month ago who came highly, highly recommended by at least six people in our community. This wonderfully spoken-about dentist put a crown on my dad, and he has no problems with it. My dad was and still is pleased, and so were many other people I spoke to about him, so I decided I’d finally go for a checkup. In ten years, my family and I have been through three dentists with dismal results. I was finally hopeful. I knew I needed to see a dentist, as it had been three years and my wisdom teeth were giving me some indications things weren’t right.

First my husband went to him for his checkup, and he came home with a $1,700 estimate. That immediately put me on alert. He didn’t have cavities, either. He supposedly had cracks in his teeth from large amalgam fillings and the doctor told him to switch them to composite (which I know is less durable), but he told my husband composite is better, because it actually sticks to teeth and will prevent further cracking. I told my husband that he needed to get a second opinion, that I didn’t feel right about it, but neither of us knew who to go to that we could trust, so we dropped the ball. I did read online that composite fillings do stick to teeth better, but they only last on average 7 years versus 20 or more for the traditional metal.

When I went, the dentist told me I needed $1,400 worth of work. I had nearly flawless teeth! I was suspicious of him, until he showed me a photo of one of my cavities. It shocking, to say the least, staring at me ten times its normal size. A black little devil moved into one of my wisdom teeth, and the appearance of it was horrifying. I felt dirty! It was gross. I got emotional. I turned away in disgust. I didn’t want to see anymore. I convinced myself I was aging and that I needed to accept it.

This guy was really high-tech. Not only did he take x-rays, but he used a new tool that checks the density of your tooth to identify cavities. The tool, which looks like a pen and glides over your teeth, gives a number. The higher the number, the higher likelihood of decay. The dentist was all excited by this tool. As he went across my teeth, my numbers were not good. Most of molars scored in the 40s, 50s and 60s. I forget the ideal number, but it was supposed to be under 20 I think. My heart sank. I wanted to run away!

I kept watching the dentist, trying to make a determination of honesty, but I knew it doesn’t take much for a dentist to say, “You have 8 cavities” when in reality you may only have 1 or 2 — especially if he has a machine that whirled up a high score for him. He isn’t likely to leak any clues. It isn’t what I would consider high stakes. He could also say that is what his equipment said and he trusted it. Who could dispute that?

The only real way to get to the truth in dentistry, or any technical situation, is to do your homework. But after years of searching for a dentist, ending up in a crackpot’s chair on a recommendation and ending up in a dirty office in another, and one that was an outright liar, I was at my wits end!

Upon my husband’s request, however, I did asked the dentist to see my husband’s photos of his cracked teeth. There was no denying there were cracks. With that, I told myself to stop worrying all the time, and I went in for my first appointment to fix three of my eight cavities. Out of fear of not knowing what else to do, I took a blind leap of faith.

I had this nagging feeling that I needed to investigate, but I didn’t want the inconvenience of what I would find. I didn’t want to have to meet more creepy dentists or ignore things another three years. That scared the hell out of me and gave me a pit in my stomach.

Don’t do this!!!

After the work was complete, I went home and I noticed the dentist said I had a cavity in my front tooth for the next visit. That finally alarmed me into action. I suspected my wisdom teeth did have issues, but a front tooth? What the hell?!

Oh when I left, he said he hit the nerve in each wisdom tooth, and I might need a root canal on two of my three teeth. That bothered me! I had no pain, but the decay went to my nerve? That’s sounded like crap!

Low and behold, my teeth started aching when I bit down, and when it didn’t subside the next day, I called and the assistant said they were just closing the office because the doctor was going on vacation. I’d have to wait 10 days!! I once worked in a dental office before, and I knew this was unacceptable for someone who was in pain! Good dentists have a backup doctor to call in an event like this. This guy was too greedy! It was another alarm. A really good dentist would stay open an extra hour if he was going out of town to help a patient in need. Not this guy! I was mad.

I went in to get my x-rays yesterday as the dentist is out of town. I asked the secretary if she could spot decay on the x-rays and she piped up that she could. She said she had been working in the dental field for decades. She then looked at mine and couldn’t find one! When I asked her for the x-rays for the wisdom teeth and the one molar he had just filled, she said he didn’t have any! I was floored.

She quickly recovered by saying that the dentist didn’t need them, they were visually obvious. Right. Not. His assistant took the x-rays of my teeth before he ever saw me, so that was likely a lie. I then asked the receptionist, who talked like a dutch uncle, to give me the name of that machine that checked the density of my teeth. She did. I finally learned its name and what I have read since turns my stomach.

I immediately found that this new tool, the DIAGNOdent, should only be used after a hygienist cleaning, because small food particles can cause false-positives. My dentist used this tool BEFORE my teeth were cleaned. Obviously, he likes false positives. He is no dumby and this was no accident. I am confident of that!

The machine also has a higher false positive reading than it should according to researchers/experts, and most expert studies that I read said that this tool should not be used alone to diagnose decay (that doing so is “unethical”). They say that it should only be used in conjunction with x-rays and visual inspection. According to the receptionist, he was relying on this tool to fill my other remaining cavities.

I came home and looked online what cavities look like on x-rays and for the most part, I should be able to see some of them. I can’t find ONE.

And upon close inspection last night, my husband and I found that horrible cavity I saw in the chair a month ago was still there. I need to see today if I have an x-ray of that tooth. I probably don’t! The dentist filled my other teeth first. Needless to say, the fear that stopped me from listening to the red flags I did see, to go see another dentist, wasn’t avoided by my emotions. I still have to do it, I just may have paid a price for it instead! I will never do this again.

Here are some of the red flags I ignored because of fear of finding another dentist overwhelmed me:

  1. When I asked my husband if they used the density tool on his teeth he said no. Instead of doing my homework, I thought that perhaps they can’t use it on teeth with silver (amalgam) fillings. That is an incorrect assumption. They can still test the margins. The fact that this guy didn’t, shows his inconsistency. It wasn’t worth his time with my husband, but it was a huge money-maker for me with all of my perfect white teeth!
  2. When I got my fillings, the assistant offered me a free paraffin wax treatment for my hands during the fillings. Why would they be doing this? Was it another sales tool to get people to “want to come to him”? To think he was a “nice guy”? At the time, I didn’t like the idea. It bothered me.
  3. When I left, the assistant said to me, “Tell all your friends about the paraffin wax treatment.” I was thinking at that moment, “How does that equate to good dentistry?” It’s a sale pitch thought. I said to her, “Is business that slow?” She denied it and looked away from me. I didn’t buy it.
  4. I had only two small fillings in my upper wisdom teeth prior to coming to this guy. When this guy told me I had 8 cavities, which were all perfectly lined up together — all in the back of mouth, one next to another (top and bottom), outside of one on the front tooth, I should have responded immediately and asked for evidence. Instead I was overwhelmed by the one photo of my worst tooth and that blackness.
  5. When I asked around to my friends and family if anyone ever had a cavity on their front teeth. They all answered no. That’s a red flag for me because I never even had a cavity until I was 34. I am going to be real curious if I have a cavity there. The x-ray and visual inspect look good to me and my husband.
  6. This dentist used a new tool I knew nothing about and was relying on it heavily. I should have immediately done my homework to see how reliable it was. I didn’t!

I am oh-so human, and I am vulnerable at times, too. Those damn emotions of fear and stress!!!!

__________
Wholly crap. I just saw this video on YouTube about Diagnodent and I was never offered a “non-invasive” procedure that sandblasts off the decay. I’m even more outraged! Pardon me while I scream.


Somer Thompson’s Mother

Somer Thompson’s body was found this week, sadly. News reports are saying that Somer was walking home with her twin brother and sister, when she got in an argument with them and ran ahead. They say Somer never made it home.

Here is her mother, Diena Thompson, talking about the last time she saw Somer. What do you think?

Thanks, JB, for the story lead.

Indecent Exposure?

Here is the story: The naked truth?

Do you believe Williamson?

This is a case posted on my Topic Suggestion Page. Please note that I am taking some time off, away from cases for the next week or so, to regroup, so I won’t be sharing my thoughts or opinions. But in the meantime, I will post cases and you guys can feel free to banter your thoughts amongst each other!

Total Relief?

Mayumi does a horrible acting job here, if you want my opinion. After seeing her here, I don’t trust her. Remember emotional memories that I speak about? Well, Mayumi doesn’t have any, and if you thought your child was missing and could possible be killed because of a mistake you or your husband made, let me tell you (well, you all know!), you’d be as emotional as heck. Mayumi? Not at all. Notice she has no recollection memories of what the “terror” was like? She says lots of people helped her, but she can’t say who outside of the police? Her lack of emotional memory here is a gigantic red flag. Add that to what the little boy said, and to the fact he was throwing up, and I really think this was a hoax. The question is when did they decide to go with this hoax? After they accidentally released the balloon? Or before?

Two people have pointed out that I spoke prematurely for myself (Ruth on Facebook and Sarah). I originally wrote in my first post, “So at this point, I tend towards the fact that this was an accident, and not a hoax, but I sure would like to see the boy speak more and ask questions to probe why he said it. That needs to be looked at further so we can understand it, and then and only then can a final determination be made.” At least I was never conclusive.

What a mess this has been!

Some people have been writing me with theories. Is it possible that Richard accidentally released the balloon without a plan, and really did think for an instant that his son might have been in it, but then realized that he wasn’t. I saw Richard make expressions that showed he was distraught over Falcon, but Mayumi doesn’t. Would that explain that aspect? Then they decided to take their “media stunt” and run with it, so they hide Falcon in the attic? I could really believe this is the truth. Everything for me would then make sense.

Update 10-20-2009:
I must say after this whole debacle, my brain is mush and I need to walk away for a while to get clarity. I don’t trust myself at this point to read this case at all right now.