True Story : Answer

Is your friend telling you the truth or a lie? Not sure what I am speaking about? Read this first!

This is a true story that was told to a member of my family a little over a year ago. When the story was relayed to me, it just didn’t sit right. Mind you, I didn’t hear the story being told by the story originator (we don’t even know who that is), so with that, I didn’t get to see facial expressions, or body language clues that could assist me in making the determination if this was the truth or a lie. I discovered the facts, here, simply by applying logic.

Read more As I sat contemplating how I’d have to change my lifestyle if, in fact, two thieves were running around my neighborhood, I kept hearing my family member relay the story to me. In particular, I kept hearing them say, “It takes ten days to get published in the newspaper.” As I looked out the kitchen window, those words kept playing through my mind like a bad song you can’t purge from your memory.

After I stopped thinking about all the ways this would affect me and my life, the broken record finally got through to me, and I realized this was pure bull dust! We live in the information age. Ten days? No way! Maybe back in the stone age, but as long as I have been alive, the morning headlines have always been up to date. I knew this was pure, and dirty hogwash.

Another thing that immediately bothered me was the word “robberies”. People weren’t being held up with a gun. These were burglaries. If the cops knew about this, and were perhaps at the association meeting, this would have been stated accurately. And frankly, you don’t call an association meeting and tell people this horrifying news without police support and guidance to (a) help catch the bastards (b) give safety advice to the neighbors/neighborhood. While the words could get mixed up, it was just another flag that I filed in my list of concerns.

Furthermore, I started to question the fact that these guys were black. How do we know these guys are black? Did someone’s security camera get them taped? Did someone see them? If so, then where are the artist renditions or video footage or black and white photos?? Why aren’t there WANTED signs posted around? Furthermore, why weren’t they handed out at this supposed association meeting?

Another signal to me was why would one neighbor know about this from the association meeting and not the other? The likelihood is that both neighbors live in the same association. If this information was going to be told at an association meeting, wouldn’t there have been a flier put out, perhaps? Maybe, maybe not, but if the police were involved, and wanted to catch this guy, you can pretty much be sure they would want to let everyone know, so people could help spot these guys, and solve the crime spree. So, likely there would have been a flier, and a flier with faces of these guys on it. It’s not a certainty, but certainly likely. Another potential red flag.

Also, the details were spooky. Who was dreaming this up? A hat and gloves? They’d only take jewelry, drugs and cash. What, these guys didn’t care about TVs, DVDs, or computers? That’s unusual. People who steal for drugs want money!! Anything valuable is worth money.

And they didn’t break anything, but took these specific valuables. Twenty four homes had open windows and doors, in a matter of a couple of weeks, that were left unlocked when no one was home. What are the odds??

This story was smelling really rotten to me so I got online and browsed the local papers. Nothing. Zip. Nadda.

Then I asked my husband to call the local police and ask about it. I wasn’t buying it, and furthermore, I wanted this demon of monsters roaming the neighborhood stopped. We don’t have many black people in this town, and I can’t imagine how a rumor of this proportion would affect them, unfairly!

On our way home from my relatives house, we saw a black family fishing and my heart sunk. How many people looked at them with fear? Unfairly. Unjustly. How many people treated them rudely out of pure ignorance?? It was vile and wrong.

My husband made the call. The police said they weren’t aware of any break-ins in the past couple of weeks. When my husband said he had heard there were 24, they said they would absolutely know about them, and that there were none reported, rest assured.

My relative called her friend and told her the news. She was relieved. I personally don’t believe she was invested in any security company, or had any ulterior motives. I think she was truly afraid. Someone started a false rumor for one reason or another and at least I stopped it. Being a new widow is enough for any person to deal with–forget adding on the fear of “robbers” in the neighborhood. No, thanks!

Be vigilant. Look over the facts–think about them. Ask yourself are the facts logical? Question them and then, if possible, verify what you can. While your friend may not be knowingly telling a lie, someone is and has passed it on to her, and you have the power to stop it — dead in its tracks.

True Story?

Originally published on my blog in 2006.

Imagine you live rural, and you get a phone call.

(((Ring, ring)))

It’s your neighbor friend. She says hello and then you say hello. Then she starts talking…

“How are you? I’m just calling because I found out something you might want to know about. I guess there have been 24 robberies in the neighborhood very recently, so recently it hasn’t made the news yet. You know, it takes 10 days or so for the papers to get the story published.”

She goes on, “I’m really afraid. I went out and bought some security equipment.” She explains the equipment to you, and tells you how vulnerable she feels living alone.

Read more“They say it is two black men, and they break in during the day when no one is home. They don’t break windows or anything — they take entry via open doors and windows. They take cash and jewelry and prescription drugs. They also wear gloves and a hat.”

You can tell she is concerned. You live in an area where there are lots of vacant vacation homes. She continues, “I found out about it from my neighbor who lives right next door. She went to an association meeting where they discussed it. Be safe, okay?”

Is your friend telling you the truth, or a lie?

Why do you say that?

New Dentist: What do you think?

I recently made an appointment to get my teeth cleaned at a highly recommended dentist in town. When I called, I told the secretary that I did not want to have x-rays so she could take that into account when planning the time for my appointment. I used to be a dental assistant years ago, so I know that this was a decent courtesy for schedule planning.

To my surprise, she said to me that if I didn’t get x-rays, the dentist wouldn’t see me. That was a first, ever.

I politely explained to the woman that I had just seen another dentist to have a cavity fixed, and that I didn’t need x-rays again. I had just had a full-mouth x-ray at this other dentist, and I could bring along the records.

She apologized, but told me that this was their policy that upon seeing this dentist, he would do a full-mouth x-ray, even if I just had one. It was their policy.

Read more I was a bit floored, but since he came so highly recommend, I explained the woman that I found flaw with their policy hoping I could convince her to reconsider. I stated that I was not going to subject myself to more radiation (a second time in a matter of weeks) when it wasn’t necessary — just because this doctor thought I should, and I asked her to talk to the doctor for me.

She told me he wouldn’t budge on his policy, but she’d have him call me.

He did. Here is what he said:

I really care about my patients teeth, and if you want to come see me, I need to do a full x-ray of your mouth, even if you’ve just had one. I want to make sure they were done properly, and I want to ensure you get a quality checkup.

How can I do a good job if you take away my tools?

You could come back later, and say I didn’t do a good job if I didn’t take the x-rays to spot all potential problems, and I don’t want that, so for the first time, I require x-rays. By not getting the x-rays, you are putting me in a position where I could be held liable. And I don’t want to rely on another person’s x-rays. I don’t know how good they are.

Once I do this full mouth x-ray, however, after that, I don’t care what you do. You can do whatever you want. If you never get another x-ray again in my office, that’s fine with me.

What do you make of that? Is this a good, caring dentist, or someone who should raise an alarm bell?

My Thoughts

This doctor is inconsistent in his behavior. He tells me that he cares, and because he cares, he requires that I get a full mouth x-ray because my old dentist may not have done it right.

Okay, that’s fair, so I would expect him to continue to require me to get a full-mouth x-ray every so many months, if this is his belief. But he doesn’t.

He tells me that if he doesn’t give me at least one set of x-rays, he can be held liable. After that, he says he doesn’t care what I do.

I suspect this means this man doesn’t care what I do so long as I cover his liability risks. Or, I would expect him to tell me why and how come his policy is so important, but he doesn’t. This is inconsistent with someone who is caring about my teeth.

This dentist is not someone I would trust, personally. I consider this inconsistency easy to spot. How about you?

McCanns Release New Sketch

The McCanns have released a second sketch in the hunt for Madeleine on Sunday. According to Clarence Mitchell, a vacationer in Praia da Luz, Gail Cooper, spotted this man on April 20 on the beach of the resort where the McCann’s stayed. They noticed him because he stood on the beach, alone, in the pouring rain.

Furthermore, he approached Cooper, and told her he was collecting money for a local orphanage. Then a few days later Cooper says she saw the man on the beach with a group of children. Yet when investigators working for the McCann camp looked, they found no such orphanage.

It’s a bit odd.

Furthermore, does this sketch resemble the sketch created by Jane Tanner’s description? And corroborated by Irishman Martin Smith?

I believe it does.

Source: CNN

Interpreting Body Language: The Head Shake

A reader asked me the following:

I have a question that I wonder would be of interest to your website viewers. On this video clip, Hillary Clinton keeps make affirmative statements, but her head keeps shaking “no”. The back and forth ‘no’ motion on her head seems to be opposite her words, and it is very distracting. I do not have any political judgments, so I am not being biased about Hillary. I just am perplexed. Her body language makes me feel very uneasy and mistrustful.

This interview with Senator Clinton is just after she won the New Hampshire primaries.

What Senator Clinton is doing here is what I would call a head swagger. It’s actually her confidence that is causing this, and it is not what I would call a head shake no when she is saying something affirmative.

Read moreWhen people shake their head no when they say yes (a gesture, I believe), it is a quick, swift movement. It comes from the subconscious, and it is most alway brief. It doesn’t languish on like this does, and furthermore, when conscious thoughts kick in, the person usually stops the “no” movement abruptly and switch to a “yes” motion. You can see the thoughts “kick-in” to conscious awareness. It quite fast, and fascinating to witness.

I bet if you were to ask Senator Clinton if she was aware that she was shaking her head in this interview, she would tell you she had no idea until she witnessed it firsthand by watching the video herself.

Here is another post on the head shake (sentence and link added 10/09).

Got a question about a candidates body language or facial expression? Ask me.

Note to Readers:
(1)
I do not endorse any candidate. I am merely trying to help people understand the candidates as best as I can. (2) I do not wish to get involved in the political debate. I merely wish to answer genuine and honest questions about body language, and facial expressions.(3) As long as I believe I can remain unbiased, I will continue to do so. (4) I do not moderate my comments, and I don’t plan to, but if people decided to make my blog a political place to vent, I will start moderating until the elections are finished, or I will stop talking about politicians in general. (5) Respectful opinions are welcome, however, political bashing will not be tolerated.