Eyes-for-Lies Child

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Since I had my epiphany back in October, I have been re-examining my life. Little bits and pieces are now making a lot more sense. I am understanding so much more about myself,like why I am a great negotiator. Suddenly I understand how come I have been able to settle large legal battles without ever going to court, and without having to hire my own attorney. These are the perks!!

In reflecting back to my childhood, I got a really good laugh. My favorite card game? It was Lie. I loved that game and if you were a childhood friend of mine, I can guarantee you played it with me, over and over again.

I didn’t even remember how to play the game upon reflection so I looked it up on the web. I guess it is officially called “Lie Detector”. I never knew that. Here are the instructions if you have interest. I wish I knew who taught me this game.

In any case, my best friend in fourth grade moved away to Pennsylvania, and being that we were good friends, we kept in touch. Low and behold, somehow or another, I got an invitation to fly out to visit them over the summer. The year was 1977. Star Wars was just opening in theaters. I was 9 years old.

One evening during the visit, I managed to convince my hosts, very religious baptists who lived a very strict life by the book, that the perfect game that evening would be Lie. I can only imagine their horror! Back then, of course, I was clueless. Thankfully, they knew I wasn’t a religiously-raised child, and still accepted me, corruption and all.

We sat down at their modern danish-style wood dining room table which was long and large to accommodate their family of five. I explained the game to the my friend’s Dad who was joining us. Her mom was off doing chores. Three of the four walls of the dining room were solid glass, and displayed a stunning wooded view beyond. We were totally secluded. It was pure heaven to me! I loved to travel (even alone at age 9), loved the outdoors and nature, loved my friend and I was going to play Lie. It couldn’t get any better!

Once the game started, nightfall arrived. Since this game came really easy to me and these kids were horrible liars, I actually got a little bored, and it was during this boredum that I realized that the glass walls made for great mirrors.

I could actually see everyone’s hand of cards reflecting in the glass, so when their turn came and they lied, I could call them on their bluff 100% of the time. In the game, when it is your turn, you play your cards face down, and declare what they are as you place them on the deck. You have to go in a sequence. If you don’t have the correct cards, you can lie, or you can draw and pass. If you are caught in lie, you pick up the cards below. The first one to play all his cards is the winner.

Now with my discovery, I didn’t have to read faces anymore!!! I could use the mirror and be absolutely “perfect” at detecting lies. I knew then I was good but now I could be flawless! I was so excited!!!

I sat there, and at first, randomly applying my magic because I didn’t want it to be obvious. Then as the game went on, I applied my magic 100% of the time. My target and hardest to read of course was my friend’s dad. When I started nailing him, 100% of the time, he got wide-eyed. I remember him staring over at me in disbelief. I’m sure he was thinking “What the heck is up with this little nine-year-old kid?” At first, he didn’t know what to think. You could just see pure disbelief. He’d smile and then his smile would drain away from his face. His wheels were spinning.

I had really stumped them all — i n a b i g w a y. So bad, that my friend who wasn’t in on the joke stormed off to bed quitting out of frustration. She was sick of picking up all the cards (who wouldn’t be?). This wasn’t the first time I had won, but it was the first time I was doing it so swiftly.

My friends father was totally baffled. I still remember his face as he stood up after the game ended, and I declared victory again in giddy joy. He started seriously questioning me. He just couldn’t figure me out. He was a well-recognized engineer at a well-known fortune 500 company, and this 9-year-old child totally stumped him (grin, grin).

I remember being all giddy and laughing like a fool. Then as he stared me down in total disbelief, I got serious and tried to claim magical powers, but no one at the table was buying it yet they couldn’t come up with a logical explanation for how I had been so accurate.

I’ll never forget the look on my friend’s dad’s face as long as I live.

I majorly disrupted this evening affair. Mystery was in the air.

With incredible pressure from my girlfriends father (hard puzzled looks, and refusing to accept my magical responses), I finally broke down and confess to my sins. I didn’t want to, but the intrigue was so intense, I felt I had no other option. It was clear answers were required.

If only you could have seen the shock on their faces! Remember, these were strict Christians, whose children were raised with a paddle, and weren’t allowed to talk back. They lived in fear of the paddle, and here I come with my silly game!

I knew no such boundaries as a child. I was allowed to talk back within reason and express myself because my mom believed it taught me to think for myself. Oh boy, did it! How embarrassed she would have been if she were there that night!

I still wonder what the parents must have thought about me at the time. I wasn’t a good influence as I taught their children how to cheat playing an innocent card game called “Lie”.

I can only imagine they were happy to send me back home in a few days — thankful I wasn’t going to influence their soon-approaching adolescent children! They must have felt complete horror though they did laugh at my clever antics! Thankfully. They were good people!

It’s one of my favorite memories from childhood. This family really welcomed me with open arms when I was frequently rejected as an odd child. I will always have a soft-spot in my heart for them.

Was it a hate crime?

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I am sure the face and story of Matthew Shepard are seared into the brains of most people. Young beautiful gay guy beaten, tied up and left for dead in Wyoming. The year was 1998. Matthew Shepard was a college student with a big bright future. That’s the story most of us know…

However last night, I decided to watch a video tape recording of ABC’s 20/20 from November 26th which had the first ever interview with the two convicted murderers: Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson.

Since I am fascinated with lies, I was really interested to watch these two guys. However, they proved much harder to read than the average guy. They are polished. Plus other sources in the story added to the mix and confusion as they weren’t trustworthy either.

Certainly these two young killers had years of practice at lying and deception as they were heavily involved in drugs scene, most specifically with meth. McKinney, the instigator of the killings, says he was strung out on meth for an entire week without sleep prior to the murder. He says he just wanted money and more drugs — so when Shepard, drunk in a bar, asked for a ride home from him as they sat and talked that night — McKinney says he saw an opportunity to rob Shepard. Henderson said he quickly realized the plan of action.

I believe them here. I believe the motivation for the crime initially was money for drugs.

McKinney continues to say the killing wasn’t motivated by Shepard’s sexual orientation. It was when he answered Elizabeth Vargas that I saw a expression (I suspect what experts would call a microexpression –an expression that flashes on someone’s face for an instant — which most people aren’t privy too). He squinted his eyes with a deep sincere anger for a flit of an instant. It made his statement completely convincing. By this expression, you knew he was really pissed off by the fact people thought this was a hate crime when it was really just a case of drugs, money, robbery and murder. However, he didn’t want people to see this emotion. He was trying to hide it.

As for Henderson, when Vargas asked if he had an prejudice against gays, he flat out lied. He paused, looked around and didn’t have a good answer. He truly had problems with gay people but apparently he didn’t beat Shepard. He just never stopped McKinney and helped save Shepard.

McKinney goes on to say that on the ride to Shepard’s home, he had planned to pull a gun on Shepard to rob him but Shepard put his hand on his knee — and that send him into a rage. He said he then just beat Shepard with a gun and continued to beat Shepard. He said it was a rage that once was started couldn’t be stopped.

Meth is known to cause violent outburst for the most benign circumstance. I believe McKinney here. I have no doubts.

Several people spoke on 20/20 about McKinney. They said he was known to have sex in a threesome: two men and a woman. The mother of his child says today she believes he is bi-sexual because before all of this, he asked her to be part of a threesome with two guys. Another man, a limo driver named Copp, also spoke about stories he had supposedly heard about McKinney having sex in a threesome. When asked how he knew, Copp then switched his story and said he knew because he was one of the guys. Copp was lying. You could see it by the phony machismo face he made. It wasn’t sincere at all.

The facts of this case are overwhelming. I don’t believe McKinney hated gays. I believe him when he says this killing wasn’t motivated by hate. Nor does anyone ever offer anything to the contrary — that McKinney did talk about hating gays — yet a simple gesture for sex is what started a violent outburst from McKinney and caused him to kill Shepard.

What a FINE LINE.

Another odd fact: McKinney says he didn’t know Shepard prior to the killing — yet multiple people spoke out on 20/20 stating that they did in fact see them together. However, none of the people speaking up were convincing. I don’t believe they were lying but due to the fact they were all drug users, I don’t trust their perception which leaves a gray area for me.

Was McKinney bisexual and keeping it a secret?

Did he know Shepard beforehand — and perhaps had some secret encounters with him? Is that why when Shepard put his hand on McKinney’s knee that night, McKinney flipped? Did McKinney flip because he knew Henderson hated gays and would never let him live it down??

It’s all so intertwined and twisted! I do firmly believe:

  • McKinney didn’t hate gays.
  • Henderson did.
  • McKinney intended to rob Shepard, Henderson just followed along.
  • McKinney didn’t plan on killing Shepard but did in a rage.
  • McKinney was bi-sexual.

I wonder:

  • if McKinney knew Shepard beforehand. I suspect yes, he is lying but I am uncertain. McKinney is hard to read here.
  • if McKinney had secret sexual encounters with Shepard before (pure speculation).

Playing Poker

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One of my readers, Mayim, asked me, “Have you thought of playing poker professionally?”

Actually, no I haven’t. I don’t like to gamble. More than that, seeing lies is only half it. To be good at poker, I am going to guess you have to equally good if not even better at bluffing! On that front, I have no idea of my skills level.

Interesting question though 🙂

Calling the Plumber

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A week ago, today, I picked up the phone and called our local plumber who we have used before. I had left him a message the previous Thursday and since he didn’t call back, I called him one more time.

I was surprised when he answered the phone instead of his secretary at two in the afternoon. I asked him if I caught him at a bad time and he said no. I then told him we have a lot of work that we need to get done (explaining it in a little detail) and asked if he could come out and give us a quote.

He replied, “Sure. Are you going to be around this week?”

“Not this afternoon, but the Tuesday and Wednesday,” I shot back with a raised eye-brow and then a frowning, wrinkly face — getting frustrated.

“Good,” he said. “I’ll call you back then. Okay?”

Let down, I said okay and we hung up before I knew it.

My mind was bursting at the seams with emotion. He just lied to me!! He isn’t going to call me back!! He didn’t want the work for whatever reason. He doesn’t want the job, but didn’t want to tell me!!

I was pissed off. Why would he call me back later when he can arrange an appointment now? It made no sense – especially since he said it wasn’t a bad time to be calling him. It was a tactic to rid himself of the obligation!

I thought about calling him back up and saying if you don’t want the work, can you at least just tell me?! I need a plumber for Pete’s sake and I don’t care to wait around for another week on the hopes I can work with you!! Worse, I don’t know who else to call!!!!!

Tuesday and Wednesday came and I didn’t get a phone call. I always hope I am wrong, but nooo…no, I wasn’t. Damn it!!

Who is telling the truth?

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I was watching the Chicago news last night. An elderly black man accidentially bumped the car in front of him. The man in the car that he tapped, got out, put a gun to the elderly man’s face and threatened him. The guy with the gun then goes back to his car, calls the police and they arrive.

The police talk to the elderly black man, and he tells them the other guy threatened him with a gun so the police handcuff the other guy. The other guy then says he is a police officer, and they then proceed to take off the handcuffs — and the off duty cop then says the elderly black man tried to run him over and succeeded in pressing charges against the elderly black man for assault. The black man then gets locked up.

The black man denies ever moving his car.

So, who is telling the truth?

On the news, they interviewed the elderly black man and his son. I am 100% confident that the black man is innocent. The way he spoke, the way he looked at the camera and the story he told was completely consistent. More than that, it is just a gut instinct. I believe him. I don’t need to hear the other half of the story to know.

The black man’s son (who is also a cop in another jurisdiction) said something interesting. He said, “A law officer who pulls a gun after a very minor traffic incident is unstable, and should be fired.”

This is so sad to see. My heart goes out to that black man and his family. You wonder if this was racially motivated. I would love to see this off-duty cop in an interview, and I’d love to hear from the cop who charged the elderly black man and locked him up. I’d love to hear their stories and basis for their actions.

Here is the story in print.