Expression of the Day (Dec 5 2014)

What expression do you see in the photo above?

Janay Rice and Camille Cosby

Janay Rice spoke out for the first time since she was knocked out by her NFL football player husband, Ray Rice, earlier this year.

It’s very painful to see Janay talk in complete denial–protecting Ray, and showing anger toward the public and the media for airing their story. She is clearly putting the blame in the wrong place, and unconditionally accepting her husband.

Ray’s callous and cold behavior is not “shock” or disbelief when he is shown on video ignoring Janay who is passed out cold on the floor. The video shows a pompous, arrogant man who has no regard for what he had just done to his wife.

This does not bode well for their relationship or future, and I have fear for Janay’s well being if she stays with Ray as she seems to be currently doing.

Many people have asked me about Camille Cosby’s behavior in the wake of the Cosby situation, too.

People wonder why these women stay so loyal to a man in such dark situations.

For the average person, walking away from your life amidst difficulties is hard. You have to literally start your life over. That by itself is scares a lot people into denial and causes them to blindly and often dangerously try again, and again, or turn their back on problems in hopes they will go away.

Now add that these two women are married to men who have earned substantial amounts of money, albeit different for each man, but walking away from a well-to-do lifestyle is even harder. Imagine going from a lovely home, staff that cares for you, and a top quality life and walking out into a bleak cold world where you have no way to maintain your lifestyle.

Furthermore, these men are strong dominant men, and typically these types marry subservient women who cater to their husband’s celebrity and fame, and are not used to being the dominant and defiant one. They are not used to being the one in charge, making decisions and controlling their future. They are not comfortable executing big changes, and so they often go into denial.

It’s not pretty to watch, but is part of the human spirit to want to keep what is good and push away what is bad at all costs.

So even if these two women have ideas that thing aren’t right, it’s much easier in the “short term” to turn their backs than to deal with these situations. Life appears to be, at least temporarily, more comfortable right now staying put and pushing away the problems.

The reality is in the long run it will be that much harder, but they don’t have the foresight to see it nor do they want to.

A Study of Honesty (12-1-14)

It’s interesting to watch the reporter talk about the incident he recorded. While we don’t know which way the bullets went, we can be certain that he is telling the truth.

Is this what you would expect for an honest response?

Darren Wilson


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I have reviewed the Darren Wilson interview and testimony this morning. This is an extremely emotional case for people, and when people are emotional, their ability to be logical and see the truth plummets. That’s scientific fact. I highly recommend reading up on neuroscience experiments that study emotion and reasoning, and how it affects our decision making process. You may be surprised to learn how your emotions will trump logic every time.

With that, sharing what I see as the truth right now will have little effect on people because I won’t change minds or get people to consider the elements I point out. Most people don’t work at delineating their emotions from reasoning. It’s a skill that takes a lot of practice to develop and do effectively. Hence, I will either confirm that my thoughts align with yours, or that they don’t, in which, you are likely to say I have lost it or missed it. And frankly, I see no point in doing that because every time I have done so in the past, the insults that get wielded in my direction made it clear it wasn’t worth my investment because I didn’t effect change for the good. Instead I caused lots of frustration and anger, bad feelings and insults. And that’s not productive.

So instead of alienating an audience on a polar and highly emotional topic, I would prefer to continue to discuss cases where people aren’t as emotionally invested, and we can have great discussions which foster growth and change.

I hope you can respect my decision.

Thank you,

Renee

In the meantime, feel free to share your thoughts by voting in the poll below:

[polldaddy poll=8479339]

Darren Wilson Poll


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I have reviewed the Darren Wilson interviews this morning. This is an extremely emotional case for people, and when people are emotional, their ability to be logical and see the truth plummets. That’s scientific fact. I highly recommend reading up on neuroscience experiments that study emotion and reasoning, and how it affects our decision making process.  You may be surprised to learn how your emotions will trump logic every time.

With that, sharing what I see as the truth right now will have little effect on people because most people don’t work at delineating their emotions from reasoning. It’s a skill that takes a lot of practice to develop and do effectively.  Hence, I will either confirm that my thoughts align with yours, or that they don’t, in which, you are likely to say I have lost it or missed it.  And frankly, I see no point in doing that because every time I have done so in the past, the insults that get wielded in my direction made it clear it wasn’t worth my investment because I didn’t effect change for the good.  Instead I caused lots of frustration and anger, bad feelings and insults.  And that’s not productive.

So instead of alienating an audience on a polar and highly emotional topic, I would prefer to continue to discuss cases where people aren’t as emotionally invested, and we can have great discussions and foster growth and change.

I hope you can respect my decision.

Thank you,

Renee